Lovin' The Snow...

not so much the recent STORMS though...Let's just say that God has brought some trials and tests recently, accompanied with great blessing!

Isn't it an amazing thing to know God is real, that Jesus is alive, and that the Holy Spirit is within us (as Christians)? 

To think that my Lord cares about the smallest details of my life, 

to think that He is loving enough to show me areas (many lately!) in my life that He wants to see change! 

 To think that He wants to use His power to help me change. 

When trials and tests come, I often find myself asking, WHY?!

Through the past few weeks, my emotional state has been, well...bad. I've not been myself at times, everything seemed up and down. I'd never experienced that before, even with pregnancy and giving birth and all the hormones/emotions that go along with all of that. The Lord kept showing me things in my life that needed to change~ attitudes, thinking about or looking at things in a wrong way, etc. After I had confessed each thing I thought I'd be all better, back to normal. After two or three different times like this, I began to wonder if I would ever feel happy again. It was like the Lord took my blinders off and I could see myself how He sees me. I thought my joy was in the Lord. I thought I was trusting in Him with everything in my life. I've never been a worrier and all of the sudden, seemingly out of nowhere, I was struggling with worry and fear of the future. I was discouraged, some may describe it as being very low. I was broken, brought down to a place I needed to be in the first place. I was exhausted physically, drained emotionally, and lagging spiritually. God seemed to be taking securities away one by one...I quickly found out I was trusting in my circumstances instead of in Him.  
"He owns all the cows" is something I like to remind others of, but I had forgotten myself! God is in control of my health, wealth, circumstances, everything! I've been  so thankful in the past couple weeks to be able to hear more messages and spend more time in my Bible. Now that Clara is older (11 weeks now!), I don't spend as much time feeding her during services or sitting in the back. Two Sundays ago and this past Sunday, I got to hear all three messages and what a blessing it was! I had gone in nursery for my friend last Wednesday so someone else went in nursery for me on last Sunday night and I'm scheduled for this Wednesday. The messages I did get to hear in the past few weeks have been for me. God cares about my spiritual health as well as my physical. And each time I've been able to read my Bible, whether for a short or long amount of time, God has spoken to me through His Word. Each time I've had to stay home with the girls and got to listen to a sermon online, it's been an encouragement to me as well. God cares. Even when I wonder what He's doing, where He's leading us, or why He is making our circumstances the way He is, I know He has His reasons.

"For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways, saith the LORD. For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways, and my thoughts than your thoughts."

~Isaiah 55:8-9

The Lord has brought me into a closer relationship with Him. The last few weeks, we have been so blessed by the Lord, I can't count the ways even when I try! He has answered many specific prayers, some big and some small. He may have decided to take away half our income, but He has used His people to bless us beyond measure! Some have been anonymously and some we've been able to thank personally. We've received prayers, support, love, encouraging words, Biblical counsel, phone calls, emails, texts, food, and money from many, including some we probably don't even know about! 

"I have been young, and now am old; yet have I not seen the righteous forsaken, nor his seed begging bread. He is ever merciful, and lendeth; and His seed is blessed. Depart from evil, and do good; and dwell for evermore. For the LORD loveth judgment, and forsaketh not His saints; they are preserved for ever: but the seed of the wicked shall be cut off. The righteous shall inherit the land, and dwell therein for ever."

~Psalm 37:25-29  

I desire a closer relationship with my Lord and Saviour. I don't want to limit God by my unbelief. I have in the past, but I desire to press on to "Higher Ground". That hymn has been going through my head often these past few days, and it has always been one of my favourites. Recently during my personal devotions, I decided to write out Psalm 15 and attempt to memorize it. If you would take the time to read it too, I know it would encourage your heart.

In the midst of my storm, He gave me His peace.  

"I will sing unto the LORD, because He hath dealt bountifully with me."

~Psalm 13:6